Next Great American Band - Nov 23

Rolling Stones night on NGAB. I don’t think I can get no satisfaction, but let’s start this up and see what happens.

First band up after nearly going home last week was Tres Bien with Get Off Of My Cloud. Wow. Four bars in and I know this week is going to suck. If they were auditioning for High School Musical 3, then they would have killed. This isn’t High School Musical, so they should be killed. But I’ll give them a reprieve if they promise never to do that again.

Who dares to be called next – Denver and the Invesco Field Orchestra. They did a cover of I’m Free that actually made me miss the Soup Dragons. The performance was so lame it may have been more exciting to watch them eat soup. Especially Campbell’s Chunky Soup. Those commercials crack me up, and the athletes who do them are cursed. I feel the same fate awaits Denver and crew.

Six Wire strutted out to do The Last Time and sped it up enough such that it didn’t suck as bad as I thought I would. That’s a compliment, although I wasn’t too keen on the Oak Ridge Boys harmonies going on. They are good musicians and very polished, but that’s not what I want to see on this show – I want to see scantily clad women and car crashes. But since that’s not possible, then how about a band that’s not a template for the Billboard charts?

Light of Doom got their permission slips signed to perform again and did Jumpin’ Jack Flash. They annoy me and the vocals sucked, so enough about them. But Dicko did mention that the Stones are good role models and LoD should research them. Yeah, a couple drug overdoses should give them some credibility.

The Clark Brothers were called out to give the show some real credibility and did Gimme Shelter. Wow. The other bands should just be ashamed of themselves.

Final slot came down to Dot Dot Dot and Cliff Wagner. Unfortunately, Cliff had to go home. I think it says a lot that I missed hearing what the Old #7 was going to do with the Stones catalog this week. May their moonshine run clear and may their jugs always be full. Or some sort of Tennessee blessing that might make sense to them.

So Dot Dot Dot performed Let’s Spend The Night Together. Dicko summed it up nicely for me – as lead singer you need to command attention instead of looking like you’re desperate for it. (Ed. Note: That works pretty well for sex, too.)

I don’t see how Denver can survive another week, but I’ve been saying that since I finished my Labor Day hamburger. Tres Bien always seems to be living on the edge, but they seem to be working that like Nadia Comaneci. Light of Doom makes my head hurt, but will probably continue. I can’t figure out if America is on board with D3. Six Wire and the Clark Brothers are safer than a Marine in Disneyland. See you next week!