Well, I've been sitting out here for a few hours in Death Valley licking rocks, trying to raise awareness of the frailty of the environment on Mars. As I've previously stated, we humans have already begun littering that planet with robots. We need a Mars Day and today is the day. I'm here all by myself. Nobody else has shown up. A couple of chuckwallas stopped by and licked some rocks with me, but I have a feeling they were going to do that anyway. Power to the CHUCKWALLAS!
Am I the only one who cares? Where are we supposed to live after we destroy this planet? Certainly not Venus. That planet is a stinky ass pit. Mars is our only hope. But it won't be around if we continue to destroy its environment. The madness must be stopped!!!
Thanks a lot everybody. THANKS A FRICKEN' LOT!
This is the last time I try to throw a planet saving movement. Every human for xeself from now on. That's what I say. Screw all y'all. Good riddance when this planet starts pissing on itself. I'm gonna start building a rocket and collecting canned meat.
And I'm not going to Earth Day anymore, either!
8 comments:
Dude. You have it all wrong. You need to raise awareness first by standing on a busy corner downtown asking important people in suits, lost tourists, and homeless people if they have a minute to talk about Mars.
Then you lick rocks.
What do you know? How many planets have you saved? Weren't you in charge of the Pluto Brigade?
How'd that work out for ya, bucko?
Oh, oh! Can I be in charge of Saturn? I want to get rid of those damned rings around the planet. They are very unsightly.
You need that woman from Office Space to walk around saying, "Looks like SOMEONE is having a MARS day!"
Then you'd trick all the people looking for free candy bars into licking rocks.
You're welcome, and no charge for the advice.
I must have gotten there just after you left. The chuckywillas came back with some donuts.
Sorry I was late.
Blue tongued freak.
Talk to M&M's about sponsorship.
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