Sunday, August 07, 2005

Rock Star - August 7 - Sid

I'll try to be thorough here for everyone that didn't realize in time that the mansion show moved to Sunday night on VH1. Let that be a lesson to you for not checking this blog daily. Even hourly. In fact, why not just subscribe to LeperPop and you'll receive an email everytime a new post is published? I love technology. But not as much as all you, you see. So off we go...

Show started with the typical review of last week. Brandon said he felt out of his element but promised to work hard. Don't laugh, it worked for G.W. Then we had to watch Ty cry again. Not only did he let down himself, but apparently all gay, young, African-American men who want to front Australian rock bands with dead lead singers. MiG said he understood, since the entire country of Australia was counting on him to keep INXS from the clutches of all the other dirty North Americans.

Then we celebrated Jordis' birthday with a guitar shaped birthday cake and a visit from her boyfriend. I guess he wasn't as cool as Liz Casey since they didn't give him any camera time. Either that or they gave them some privacy to do it and then untangle their dreads.

Next off to the famous Roosevelt Hotel for the Rock Star clinic consisting of interviews with the evil wordsmiths of the mainstream media. What did we learn? Besides the fact that you must always wear sunglasses because the Roosevelt Hotel is apparently very bright.
Ty doesn't love INXS as much as JD because he apparently didn't realize that INXS had any other albums other than Kick. But he gets points from the band for being honest. Jess liked the band since 3rd grade, which means the guys are essentially fossils in her world. MiG is the only one with the balls to admit that JD is a pud. On the other hand, JD is just misunderstood and is the only one that wouldn't miss his own mother's funeral to perform at the Iowa state fair in Des Moines. Brandon thinks he has a connection with the Australian people because he played basketball there once. Just because I screwed a Koala bear doesn't mean I'm running for prime minister, buddy. Or whoever runs that country.

Next to the song selection. JD started crap again, crying about what song he wanted, then decided he was killing everyone with kindness by giving in. MiG, feeling guilty for calling JD a pud in front of the world, gave up his song to broker a compromise. I think he also knew JD would hang himself with the Crazy rope. Jess gets to keep Come As You Are and will have Kurt Cobain spinning in his grave fast enough to power a former Soviet republic. Marty gets the Killers - Mr. Brightside. Ty is going to throw down some No Woman No Cry and inspire a Broadway production of Buffalo Soldier - The Untold Story! Suzie takes on REM's Losing My Religion and could end up in the bottom three after deciding to take production advice from JD, who continues to kill the others with his particular brand of kindness.

Then we get to witness some heavy drinkin', man. I remember when I had my first beer. There was also the very uncomfortable moment when a drunk MiG confesses the a drunk JD that he was the one that said JD was a prick. That wasn't the uncomfortable part. The weird bonding that went way beyond the typical drunken "I love ya', man" was the unsettling part. But I digress.

Rehearsals to create some drama as follows: Jess is hungover, sounds like "poo", and loses any respect that the band had for her. Marty shows up not hungover and maintains all the band's respect. Suzie disregards the band's respect for her voice and insists on implementing JD's ideas for her performance this week. No word on what the rest of the gang has planned.

As a bonus for our readers, including a large contingent of Marty fans, in case you aren't familiar with Marty's song with week from the Killers, rumor has it that a link that might contain the song can be found here. Of course, if you choose to download you realize that the song is for educational purposes only and you will delete it after the show and buy the album if you really like it.


Moist Rub said...

Those bastards should make the video of each contestant's interview session available on their web site. What is this, Russia?

Sid F'er said...

How about a live 24 feed from the mansion like you can get for Big Brother?

Moist Rub said...

No. I don't want to watch them shit (well, not all of them). Just want to see the interviews. I'm calling Pat O'Brien to see if he can hook me up with his Coke dude.